I'm a snake-wino

I wasn't joking about the snake wine. Well, not joking about it's existence. I couldn't tell you if it's delicious. But it smells like vinegar and is a delightful yellow. Wes didn't try any either, so I figured there was wisdom in abstaining. 

More of the same

If you're tired of karst mountains, keep on scrolling. If they're your thing, put your feet up and stay a while. Try the snake wine, it's delicious. 

Extremely cool, evidently

So this was the most popular mountain on our trip down the Li river. Everyone ran onto the observation deck to see this mountain and count the nine horses that appear there. I could only find one, but the Chinese guy next to me got to at least eight. It must be like a Chinese Magic Eye picture, and I don't know the tricks. Come to think of it, I can never do American Magic Eye pictures. Stupid Magic Eye. 

Chillin' in the algae

Here are some water buffalo. Or oxen, or China cows. I'm not sure what the technical name for them is. But they chill all along the river, and really are pretty boring to watch. I kept waiting for one of them to explode, but it never happened. 

Defying the Elements

So the story is that karsts are made of limestone, which evidently erodes easily. This is why they can form such unusual shapes. But why would this mini-peak avoid erosion? What's so special about that tiny spot? I guess my mind just doesn't think geologically. 

Quite the Pair

I think mountains probably take a lot of pride in their heighth. There's not much else for them to compete in. And the shorter mountains really get the raw end of the deal, because there's nothing they can do about having less elevation. They can't practice hard or hope the other mountain will make a mistake. All they can do is hope for a seismic disruption that will push them higher. Mountain envy is a sad thing. 

Getting High

I've lived a pretty long life. 283 months, almost to the day. In all that time I only have one regret: not drifting down the Li river in a hot air balloon. That and shooting Ted. 

No title

This picture has no commentary. Sorry. 

Riverboat Caravan

The Li River is probably the most popular attraction in Guilin, so riding down it during National Week, there's bound to be some traffic. Thankfully the riverboats usually stayed single file, and didn't detract from the experience at all. Plus if our boat broke down (a constant fear for all transportation in China) would could always hitchhike. 

Don't tell me what my body can't digest

Wes demonstrates the real way to eat a crab. Evidently I've never really eaten a crab. I'm not terribly upset by this deficit in my life. Wes is also sick more than anyone else on the trip. I have no proof, but I can use my deductive reasoning to figure out why. 

Gay Chinese Tourists?

So the Chinese love taking pictures of Americans. It doesn't make sense, but we've accepted it. So here I am, standing with five attractive American girls on the viewing deck. Who does the Chinese guy want to take a picture with? Yours truly. I'm not saying he's gay; he didn't have a lisp and didn't make a move on me. I'm just saying he has bad taste. As shown by his shirt. Fashion police! We have SUCH an emergency. 

Mister sun, sun, mister golden sun . . .

I was trying to snag a picture of Bigfoot, but only got this scene. Mr. Foot is quicker than you'd think. The increased surface area of his foot provides traction akin to a good pair of cleats. Even though you can't see Bigfoot, you can see the following: some cool karsts, the sun, powerlines, and a bit of terraced crops. 

The Sun Will Come Out . . . Today!

So this isn't a fantastic picture. I took it from the back of a van, zipping down a winding road at unsafe speeds. But the sun was out for a couple minutes, and this was one of the only pictures I got to prove that the sun does shine in China. Rarely, but it doesn't skip over the country entirely. You can actually see the texture of the karsts. 

Ready to Raft and Roll

Our complete Guilin group, minus me behind the camera. Melissa's arm is purple because she felt the need to doodle and didn't have any paper handy. Wes evidently feels the need to cover his nipples. Meg is feeling a great deal of love for Aubrey and Lara, who don't seem to completely share the sentiment. You can't see our feet, but we're wearing fantastically ugly rubber loafers. 

End of the Line

This is where the whitewater rafting ends. Unfortunately I have no pictures of the start or the rafting itself since I would have lost my camera a dozen times over in the rapids. 

Tomb of the Unknown Picture

So, this is one of those pictures that I have no idea where I took it. But judging from its place on my camera, I think it was the day of our rafting trip. This means it was probably either on the outskirts of Yangshuo, or possibly somewhere in the country on the way to our whitewater adventure. 

Nightmare Inducing

I mean seriously, can you imagine that rabbit climbing up the foot of your bed? That's scarier than any horror movie I've seen lately. This is a Chinese combo meal. Rabbit, giant fish head, naked duck and as a side, snails. The nuts behind the plate don't look gross, but take if from personal experience, they are. 

Flat Rat Suprise

We had heard that fried rat with garlic was a local delicacy in Guilin. We hadn't heard that they don't bother to skin the rat. But our cook leaves the heads on our fish and chicken, so I guess we shouldn't have been suprised. Had the rat been of the meat-on-a-stick variety popular in China I would have tried it. But not when it can still squeak at me. 

Inner-city karst

Another one of those inner-city karsts. They really should clean up these neighborhoods. I mean, look at all the lillypads on that pond. They're in serious need of some professional pool cleaners. I guess some might consider it pretty. 

You're the Lychee of my Eye

So maybe I'm the only one that thinks that Lychee look like fly eyes. I know I'm not the only one that thinks they're delicious. Not lychee candy; that's gross. But lychee fruit are great, and I would often grab two or three for a qui as I walked down the streets of Guilin. Unfortunately I found that they don't even know what lychee are back up in Ningbo, so I've been in a withdrawl period the last few weeks. 

Nice backyard

It's hard to imagine how steep these karst hills are. Because they just pop up out of the ground, the city is built right next to them, and often around them. Here a couple hills are found in the middle of Yangshuo. 

Better than Superman

Here we see that Spiderman is clearly the best superhero. Was there a Superman store? No sir. There was even a flying, super strength and heat vision boutique next door, but they called it the Archangel, Hulk and Cyclops Outlet. On an unrelated note, this is in Yangshuo. I'm currently modeling my bamboo hat and a wicked case of redeye. 

Chevrolet in Corn Field

This pagoda has no historical significance of which I'm aware, but I thought it was a good picture. We were greeted by this sight after leaving the Dragon Assembly Cave and before getting on our bus. None of us fell off the narrow walkway, in case you were wondering. I often wonder these things. 

Rollin' Down the River

This isn't the greatest picture, but consider the fact that I was on the water. I had seasickness, violent waves and scurvy to contend with. This is the great (possibly man-made)underground river in the Dragon Assembly cave. Each boat had a pole guy and a tour guide, who gave away Chinese love balls for the best singer on the boat. You can't make this stuff up. 

Dr. Roygbiv's Cave

Chinese caves are many things, but realistic they are not. Neon lighting is employed throughout to make formations look more impressive. What can I say; it works pretty well. It also appears that they alter formations, such as forming this underground pond. But again, it looks cool, so I guess they know more about marketing caves than I do.